IS HARD ASS HELL.
how about that!
my tumbs are fast but my fingers are faster. And editing a blog, forget about it. And trying to add friends to follow, i cant figure it out via cell. Maybe the website is smarter than I am or just confusing as hell.
I have a couple topics i need to jot down, maybe they will be future blog topics who knows?
1. Application for a new friend
2. Same sex Marriage
3. Haiti Volunteers
4. Hands that tell a story...
well i will keep blogging my little thumbs away, until i get a real job or a computer. This blogging is keeping my depression at bay, to be quite honest. I think if i wasnt taking time and thinking about writing I would be having major pity parties with special guests like: Ms. Worthless, Capt. Self Hate, Lt. Lameass, d General Suicide. ughhhh I hate them all but they seem to be a part of my dark side.
Friday, January 22, 2010
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Cats
Many memories from childhood to my early adulthood; i can recall cats as a part of my past/family.
My Aunts on my mother side they had cats. My Tia Rosy had several Siamese cats that graced our presence when we went to visit her. My Tia had the most memorable childhood cat, named Sylvester. A black and white neutered de-clawed mean male cat. That cat was a pissed off little bastard. i remember me and my sister fucking with him so he can swat at us. That cat was a harder hitter. lol But my aunt loved that cat and i could see she cared for him. He lived many cat years.
My uncle gave my sisters and I a cat he found in a tank. A tank that came into Fort Hood that at one point was used for the Dessert War when President Bush Sr. was in office. That cat was named Tanker. He came home with us and lived for several cat years, i think. His death I don't remember.
Little Country Trailor Park Ferrell cats hung out at our house. maybe cause we were poor and just fed them leftovers. we could let them starve, that is mean. But when they snuck in house Papi use to throw them out but at least they all landed on their feet. But the day we named them Papi could not say no to his three daughters with thier big brown eyes and their Olivares smiles! We had cats they were ours and now they have names. Tails, the orange male cat with a huge fluffy tail, was pegged Papi's cat. He was the only male at the time and he was a survivor! He got in a lot of nasty cat fights. He got beat up, brusied, and sometimes bloodied but he was still victorious for he was the one at the front door the next day. He lived many cat years, fathered a many liters and was a true TomCat till his death. Papi I think really liked his cat.
Smoketta, another cat we all loved who mothered a kitten desentant for great glory. A three legged cross eyed cat named Staind. Poe was also part of the litter a black female. and 2 others who i can not recall.
my sisters have had cats. Jess had a deformed cat with one nut, named Piltred. (?) who eventually found his home with Julissa. And I, Oreo, sky & Diego. all who left me or i have left them. I wish I could have taken Diego but that cat was just a bad memory of my ex.
Some of my friends have cats now and than. I met most of their beloved cats. Tiffany has a kitty she adores. Jennifer H. had a big cat at her house. Jamie had a cat namd Yeyo at her mommas house. Caroline has a cat at her house who i have yet to pet cause he hides.
There was a lameass keg party i attended in college that i recall only one thing. When i sat on the couch bored and waiting to leave. I was greeted by a cat. He was great but he was an attention whore and i was eating it up for it had been awhile since i had pet a cat and he was so loving. the party went from lame to memorable just cause of that one cat. :)
Our LaPorte kittens. Frick & Frack, a brother and sister who kept us sane during our horrible stay in the asshole of Texas. The cats were at that perfect kitten stage where they love to play as well as be loved. They were great and are missed. we couldnt drive cross country with 2 cats and no carrier. *sad face*
George's cousins have cats. not just any cats, black cats. They are the first ones to tell me "we dont stop the cats forward motion." pssst what kind of bullshit is that! Yes cats are the kings of their land in their minds but we are their true masters, if i want to pet my cat i am gonna pick him up damnit! My husband and I are "those kids" lol
Yes I like cats. I am a cat person. And for the rest of my life i will at least always have one cat by my side. When the kids are all gone, when my hair is all white and when i am a little rounder and shorter, there will be a cat. An over fed cat cause if I die alone i dont want the cat to feast on me. haha morbid yes, but it happens!
I like cat stories sometimes. Bad ones like "ferrell cats make the best bait for shark fishing" is the best story i like to hear. Why cant they use stray dogs, damnit! How many cats have crossed your path?
My Aunts on my mother side they had cats. My Tia Rosy had several Siamese cats that graced our presence when we went to visit her. My Tia had the most memorable childhood cat, named Sylvester. A black and white neutered de-clawed mean male cat. That cat was a pissed off little bastard. i remember me and my sister fucking with him so he can swat at us. That cat was a harder hitter. lol But my aunt loved that cat and i could see she cared for him. He lived many cat years.
My uncle gave my sisters and I a cat he found in a tank. A tank that came into Fort Hood that at one point was used for the Dessert War when President Bush Sr. was in office. That cat was named Tanker. He came home with us and lived for several cat years, i think. His death I don't remember.
Little Country Trailor Park Ferrell cats hung out at our house. maybe cause we were poor and just fed them leftovers. we could let them starve, that is mean. But when they snuck in house Papi use to throw them out but at least they all landed on their feet. But the day we named them Papi could not say no to his three daughters with thier big brown eyes and their Olivares smiles! We had cats they were ours and now they have names. Tails, the orange male cat with a huge fluffy tail, was pegged Papi's cat. He was the only male at the time and he was a survivor! He got in a lot of nasty cat fights. He got beat up, brusied, and sometimes bloodied but he was still victorious for he was the one at the front door the next day. He lived many cat years, fathered a many liters and was a true TomCat till his death. Papi I think really liked his cat.
Smoketta, another cat we all loved who mothered a kitten desentant for great glory. A three legged cross eyed cat named Staind. Poe was also part of the litter a black female. and 2 others who i can not recall.
my sisters have had cats. Jess had a deformed cat with one nut, named Piltred. (?) who eventually found his home with Julissa. And I, Oreo, sky & Diego. all who left me or i have left them. I wish I could have taken Diego but that cat was just a bad memory of my ex.
Some of my friends have cats now and than. I met most of their beloved cats. Tiffany has a kitty she adores. Jennifer H. had a big cat at her house. Jamie had a cat namd Yeyo at her mommas house. Caroline has a cat at her house who i have yet to pet cause he hides.
There was a lameass keg party i attended in college that i recall only one thing. When i sat on the couch bored and waiting to leave. I was greeted by a cat. He was great but he was an attention whore and i was eating it up for it had been awhile since i had pet a cat and he was so loving. the party went from lame to memorable just cause of that one cat. :)
Our LaPorte kittens. Frick & Frack, a brother and sister who kept us sane during our horrible stay in the asshole of Texas. The cats were at that perfect kitten stage where they love to play as well as be loved. They were great and are missed. we couldnt drive cross country with 2 cats and no carrier. *sad face*
George's cousins have cats. not just any cats, black cats. They are the first ones to tell me "we dont stop the cats forward motion." pssst what kind of bullshit is that! Yes cats are the kings of their land in their minds but we are their true masters, if i want to pet my cat i am gonna pick him up damnit! My husband and I are "those kids" lol
Yes I like cats. I am a cat person. And for the rest of my life i will at least always have one cat by my side. When the kids are all gone, when my hair is all white and when i am a little rounder and shorter, there will be a cat. An over fed cat cause if I die alone i dont want the cat to feast on me. haha morbid yes, but it happens!
I like cat stories sometimes. Bad ones like "ferrell cats make the best bait for shark fishing" is the best story i like to hear. Why cant they use stray dogs, damnit! How many cats have crossed your path?
Monday, January 18, 2010
One Dark Car Ride
They were traveling at night. The music was on low, the wind was loud hollowing through the triangle side windows. The baby sound asleep in the back seat of the trucks extended cab. A daughter turns to her mother and says "Why do you hate my father so much, I think I am ready."
Maybe she wasn't ready because she can not remember what her mom said. She sensed her mother's hora change and fill the cab of the truck with warmth and making it uncomfortable. Her voice changed pitch her mouth moving but nothing was heard. She gripped the steering wheel harder turning her knuckles white. Her face was different, her expressions sometimes of anger and other times of great hurt and sadness. But when her voice got louder and her facial expression moved more towards of an unforgiving gaze. Her daughter said, "Okay, that's enough, I thought I was ready but I am not." She still can't remember what her mother said but non verbal communication spoke volumes. She just knew that, she missed mother for so many years. 'What if my mom was around more, what would be different?'
She wanted a relationship with her mother now. Her son was going to be one in a couple months and she wanted her son to have a Grandmother. And she needed a mother for she was one now. She would not bring up that memory again, in order to have a relationship with her mother.
Maybe she wasn't ready because she can not remember what her mom said. She sensed her mother's hora change and fill the cab of the truck with warmth and making it uncomfortable. Her voice changed pitch her mouth moving but nothing was heard. She gripped the steering wheel harder turning her knuckles white. Her face was different, her expressions sometimes of anger and other times of great hurt and sadness. But when her voice got louder and her facial expression moved more towards of an unforgiving gaze. Her daughter said, "Okay, that's enough, I thought I was ready but I am not." She still can't remember what her mother said but non verbal communication spoke volumes. She just knew that, she missed mother for so many years. 'What if my mom was around more, what would be different?'
She wanted a relationship with her mother now. Her son was going to be one in a couple months and she wanted her son to have a Grandmother. And she needed a mother for she was one now. She would not bring up that memory again, in order to have a relationship with her mother.
OK..I'll bite.
Okay, my friends have motivated me to keep up with my goals as well. Lisa and Tiffany have both started blogging to try to motive themselves and others. Well ladies it worked.
I want to be a writer one day and I am always thinking about writing but don't really sit down and write for anyone to read. Well that will change, now. I think I want to actually follow through with something and writing is a form of release for me.
I love to resist stories I have heard, whether they are good or bad. So this is my start. I am going to blog to bore everyone with my rants and raves too. lol
Right now, I am so far away from everyone that I love and miss and I think I am finally homesick. Don't get me wrong, I love it here. George's cousins are great and one of them has great potential to be considered a "BFF". But she is not mine! She is family to George. I don't have a "girlfriend" And damnit, I dont want to make a new one! I like the ones I have and picking a new friend is like picking a new family member. A friend is someone that wont judge you no matter what you are doing, someone that stands by you and cares for you.
I guess, I dont want to invest time in trying to make a friend that might later turn out to be a cunt that I dont want to ever talk to again. I mean honestly, I dont need the drama. So, I guess with that kind of attitude I am never gonna make a friend in El Paso. :)
Wish me luck on my new adventure for a new girlfriend. Hell, maybe I need to focus more on shit like getting a job, making money to pay the lawyer, and sucking my husband's dick more but i get lonely and a girlfriend would be cool to have.
Maybe my next blog will be more organized but today is the first day I have had a computer in front of me for more than 20 mins. I am eating it up, but I should be looking for jobs online not writing my first blog. he he
Good stuff huh....
I want to be a writer one day and I am always thinking about writing but don't really sit down and write for anyone to read. Well that will change, now. I think I want to actually follow through with something and writing is a form of release for me.
I love to resist stories I have heard, whether they are good or bad. So this is my start. I am going to blog to bore everyone with my rants and raves too. lol
Right now, I am so far away from everyone that I love and miss and I think I am finally homesick. Don't get me wrong, I love it here. George's cousins are great and one of them has great potential to be considered a "BFF". But she is not mine! She is family to George. I don't have a "girlfriend" And damnit, I dont want to make a new one! I like the ones I have and picking a new friend is like picking a new family member. A friend is someone that wont judge you no matter what you are doing, someone that stands by you and cares for you.
I guess, I dont want to invest time in trying to make a friend that might later turn out to be a cunt that I dont want to ever talk to again. I mean honestly, I dont need the drama. So, I guess with that kind of attitude I am never gonna make a friend in El Paso. :)
Wish me luck on my new adventure for a new girlfriend. Hell, maybe I need to focus more on shit like getting a job, making money to pay the lawyer, and sucking my husband's dick more but i get lonely and a girlfriend would be cool to have.
Maybe my next blog will be more organized but today is the first day I have had a computer in front of me for more than 20 mins. I am eating it up, but I should be looking for jobs online not writing my first blog. he he
Good stuff huh....
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