Sex, all ages.....

To Start off this blog with a classic music video from 1991. When I was 11 and I didn't know what sex really was, what the experience felt like and the responsibilities that came with having sex. So like they said...."Let's talk about sex."




Let's Talk about Sex By Salt n Pepa......


I have to admit, I had sex to early in life. The last day of 8th grade, yeah, too young, with someone that did not love me and I did not love him. Just so I can say that I was no longer a virgin. If I ever failed at anything in this life it was my own virginity. I should have saved it, for whom...who knows but maybe someone that actually had some true feelings for me.
Sex as a Teen. It's all fun and games but your mentally not prepared for the emotional bullshit that comes with it. If teenagers are going to have sex, they will find a way. We all know what I am talking about cause we were all teenagers once. We lied to our parents to go out with our friends, to hang out with our boyfriends and so forth. But sex was fun, maybe it was fun cause we had to sneak around to do it. Maybe it was fun cause it couldn't last very long cause we were always on a time crunch for curfew. But were we all really concerned about the "responsibilities" of it all. Who knows, we just had sex to have sex. Teenage boys can get a hard on by just looking at it, talking about it or just seeing a nipple. So they were always ready. And we don't want them to go find it some where else so what do we do as girls, put out. Cause once again, we have a new emotion of connection with them and we don't know how to handle it except by trying to keep them by putting out. So having sex as teen has mixed reviews.

And we are not talking about girls we called sluts. No matter what age there are girls out there putting out cause they find sex fun,very enjoyable and i guess know how to deal with the emotional DETACHMENT. Which is fine, to each their own.

Sex in your 20's. Some of us had racked up the experience during our teens, others are learning for the first time. But entering your 20's we are now more aware of our own bodies. Whether it is because we masturbate more and know what makes us tick or get off. Or just having several sexual partners that have done it and those that didn't. Our communication gets better with our sexual partners. Whether your single or taken we decide that this whole sex has to just as pleasurable to us as it is for them. We know that if we move this way, it gets us off. If he does that one thing to the left that ruins the whole fucking thing. Communication is the key the key to a fantastic sex life but we don't understand that as teenagers. We are still embarrassed about our bodies, in our 20's we understand that we might not be models but damn it this is what we have to work with and the men can take it or leave it. Cause if they don't want it, we can and will find someone that does or we can go home by ourselves and take care of business on our own. Now I am assuming that women have explored masturbation and have made it a point to find what pleasures them. Cause if you can't have sex with yourself and get you off then how are you suppose to instruct men on how you work. Now the emotional part of sex during your 20's has hopefully gotten better. Meaning you are either know how to put it aside when you know its gonna be a one night stand or you know that this man you have been seeing is gonna be a good lover and call you back the next day. We know that sex is always complicating no matter what but you want it to be fun if your going all the way with it. And as your older you have been a little more educated about the risks involved with having protected sex or unprotected sex. Not just the pregnancy scares but the STD's that might not be curable with a shot. Cause if you catch a disease that there is no cure for then your sex life will become more complicated then you would have liked. Meaning always having to tell your future sexual partners about your STD. And that is a hard truth to swallow. In 20's your more likely to go to a clinic to get yourself checked as well as get some protection, birth control as well as picking up some condoms for that dude you have been eyeballing at the club and your planning to take home. ;) As a little bit more of an experienced woman, you are still trying to find how to make sex work for you.

Sex in your 30's. Some of us have had children by then and it makes our whole sex life turn upside down. You are either in a committed relationship or your still single playing the field. There is a lot of factors that have changed since you were in your 20's except one thing. You still want to have sex and make it enjoyable for you. Some of us are working on our careers, others family and yet others are still trying to find a guy that doesn't suck and all he wants is sex.

The ones working on our careers might find that sex is the last topic on your minds or maybe the first, depends on the type of woman you are. Some women like to have financial stability of not needing someone else and sleep our way to the top. Which is not how you get there, being a bitch is the way of getting to the top. HA. Professional single woman find themselves buried in their career and might space the sex factor. I am assuming these woman just don't have the time to go out and look for a sexual partner. But I hope these women are taking care of their own selves by self pleasuring themselves. ;) Cause the best way to relieve stress is to organism and kick back, even if it is for a few minutes. It cleared your mind, your worries were gone for a few minutes and your body has just been filled with endorphins that made you happy and send good vibes through out your brain. The single women in their 30's are just trying to find a partner that is not in it for sex. They aren't trying to play games, they don't need one nighter's, they don't want to deal with more dumb daddy drama (for those who are single mommas). I believe we all want to have a meaning full sex life. Or at least a reliable friend with benefits that is NOT married, that is NOT a scumbag and that is going to understand what the relationship you have signed up for.

Busy 30 year old moms. They run around taking care of business. Up at 6 am getting ready, getting the kids out the house, the husband to work, getting this, getting that, going here, going there, doing this, doing that, work, school (whether going to school for yourself or events for the kids), making dinner, cleaning house, doing laundry....... and when its time for bed your exhausted. You would love to have sex but hell where are you going to find the energy for that? Drink a 5 hour energy? Who has time for 5 hours worth of sex? ha ha ha And then you get in bed and your partner is all in the mood but doesn't want to take the time to get you into it. And your past communicating with your partner that you are not turned on when he turns to you and asked "Do you want to suck my dick?" And you think.... "I have been up since 6 am, running around doing shit, no I don't want to add suck your dick to my to do list tonight, eat me!"
Then we don't wanna find the time for you either pal. Or maybe you have a "sex date" with your partner but you have to pump yourself up all day for this date. Cause its not the fact that you don't want to have sex but your mind and body just isn't that into it. Your libido is missing and you wish it wasn't but it is. You find your partner super attractive but your just not feeling it. You would love to have sex but the kids might wake up, your tired or just plain not in the mood. Or you have sex cause you are ready but you just can't find yourself being able to get into the moment and don't organism. You can't just concentrate on the task at hand, you feel bad but its just not there. So why even go that far if you know that your more worried about making 50 stupid cupcakes for the Valentine's day party for you kiddo and can't focus on your own needs or your partner's needs. And when you are in the mood, its in the middle of the day everyone is gone, or asleep but you would rather just watch t.v, get online or do nothing cause its your moment of peace and quiet. So there went the window of opportunity. I mean even if you surprised your partner at work and gave them the wink would they be all over it or just too busy right now baby, maybe tonight? NO not tonight, right fucking now! ha
Some of us would love to find the time, energy and want again. The want to have a sexual experience but just can't find it within ourselves. And sometimes this does lead to broken personal relationships with our partners. And that can just be the worst part, cause you want to have sex but it just went missing. And looking for someone else later to have sex with and get naked in front of is just a horrifying thought all on its own. Maybe we just don't want to have sex, maybe we want to make love more often?

What is in store for us in the 40's? Children in the house are older or gone living their own lives. No matter what your status is how will sex be? Your older, your body is older and will sex be just as enjoyable, will your urges come back or fade away. Face it we are not dead and sex is a part of life. We all love it, we all want some but after dealing with all the emotional strains from our teens, learning what we like in our 20's, our 30's were wasted cause we had other shit to worry about or just found that it was placed on a shelf. How does that effect our sex lives in our 40's? Is it a myth or fact that women experience sex in a different light when we get older?

As my friends and I are getting older I know that we will always talk about sex. Whether it is good, bad or just missing from our to do list. I just hope we can all find ourselves sexually satisfied.

Or maybe I am full of shit and everyone else is having great sex. I am left to feel like there is something personally wrong with me and my libido?

Meet Him in OUR Dreams

My son does not live with me due to unfortunate circumstances. So I started something for us to do when we are away from each other.

We meet each other in our dreams. This has been very priceless and another way for us to feel connected. My new found friend here in El Paso loves my idea and thinks I can make a children's book out of it.

So I am going to share some of our dreams we have shared in the past few months.

1. We met at the Beach, we played in the sand and built a sand castle.
2. We went to the Zoo and vistited the spider monkeys, Tigers, Lions, Panthers and The Snakes. We ate popcorn.
3. We went to the carnival and rode the merry go round. We walked around the cos way and played games and ate cotton candy and carmel apples.
4. We also went on a train ride to the North Pole (he had watched the Movie Polar Express)
5. We went back to the North Pole and we built a snow man like Frosty. We had a hat, a carrot for his nose, coals for his eyes and rocks for his buttons. (El Paso had just had snow days)
6. Pirates. We (George, Me, Agustin and Rupert, his stuffed animal dog) We were all Pirates on our ship we named She-ra, Rupert was our Pirate Pet, Mami was the cook of the crew, Mijo was 2nd in command and George was El Captain Tattoo. We named our canon He-Man and we are all had a great adventure on the high seas.

These are some of our dreams. As we create more dreams to meet in, his imagination grows and I think that is the best quality of making these dreams.
We are always looking for our next dream adventure so if anyone has any suggestions let me know. I am going to suggest we go to the moon and be astronauts.

And when we part ways or get off the phone now, Mijo always asks me, "Mami, where are we gonna dream next?" So, he is enjoying this as much as I.

Sweet Dreams Mijo and see you in our dreams.

Bed Hogging

When you finally find that one person to share your life with it comes with its ups and downs. Loving someone for their flaws and them loving you for yours.

Not only are you going to walk your life with someone hand in hand you must learn your pre-school education of sharing is caring. You have to share bathroom counter space, the television remote as well as the big one, THE BED!!

There are good things that come with sharing the bed, like mattress dancing. Now that is always fun. :)

But there are times when it seems like one partner is taking up all the room in bed. He or she is bed hogging, maybe not intentionally but it happens. When a man works all day being the bread winner of the family, sometimes his woman might need to remember the following. He is the one waking up before the sun comes up, commuting through traffic full of other half asleep men, working, driving back and coming home right before the sun goes down. So if he takes a majority of the bed than why even bitch?

Now if the lady is taking up the bed maybe the men in their lives need to remember the following. If there is children in the equation than she is running around after these little people. Loading and unloading and taking them where they need to go. Laundry, dishes and cleaning is an unending chore that is done daily, if you married the right woman that is. Having a different menu for the week so you don't get sick of just having hot dogs or spagetti every week for the rest of your life. That is a task on its own. So if she takes a majority of the bed than why even bitch?

At the end of the day, just remember that both of you are working just as hard to maintain a beautiful family. Everyone is doing their part and as long as someone gets a good night sleep to accomplish another day. And bed hogging will just be one of those little things one day you will miss when its been years of sharing and one of you has parted to the after life.

F*** Romance, GIve me PASSION.

"hey, I'll meet you there."
"No, come pick me up."
"Fine be ready." she's never ready.
"Are you bringing Anthony?"
"Nope, what little boy wants to hand out at the laundry mat?"
"Well I'M gonna see if Fern will watch Canela while we do this."
"Be ready. I gotta say my byes and grab my purse, you have 10 minutes."
End Button. If I don't let her respond, it will put her in full gear. I got the last load in the truck already. I walk into Antony's room. "Mijo, ya me voy." He looks away from the movie long enough to say, "okay mami, I love you" Hugs my legs and offers a kiss. And I except. "Mijo, Papi is in the garage, if you need something."
"Okiay, Mami" he says.
I walk out to the garage, He is tinkering with someething under the hood, playing mechanic. I still believe he doesn't know what he is doing. I stop and annouce. "I'm leaving, I gotta go pick up Jade and than to do laundry, I'll be back to make dinner, shouldn't take me long." He looked up at me, " Okay and mijo?"
"He's in his room, I just came from there, I told him you were in here."
"We'll be here, unless we make a trip to AutoMAX. Love you."
"Me, too." I slam the door of the truck. I turn the key, check my mirrors and I am out.

It's not early but it's not late. If we wanted to we could still stop by the bank for quarters. But this girl, you can give advance advance notice or spur of moment, she's gonna be late. She just runs to life, sometimes.

BEEP. Her head pops our from behind the screen door. "you know damn well, I'm not ready." "I know, I turned off the truck off, when I parked." I walk into the house, say my hellos to Fern. I see the 2 baskets in the living room, I know my job to get her out faster. She is walking around the house for the final sweep of her house. Ghe's got a pair of socks, pj's and other whatnots. She is trying to convince Fern we will not take long. "Are you almost ready, we just have one stoop to dollar store for soap and than to the laundy mat." I grab the second basket and wait outside. I left them whispering in the kitchen. Holding a small ball of clothes in one arm and touching his forearm with the other one. He is looks like he is pouting. He's just older than her but it's like she is raising a 2 year old little girl and a teen in a grown man's body. I'm outside checkin gmy phone for missed calla. Sonmtimes if I'm not 2 ring on the spot, I feel interigated, the questoon? Jade makes it out of the house a little earlier than I expected. She jumps in the passanger side, throws the clothes in the back, digs through her purse and finds her smokes. " I SWEAR " with a big loud HUFF. She can be loud, well when she's fustrated.
"We're dumb. what the hell is wrong with us? And we really do have to stop at dollar store and then coffee." I say.
She rolls her eyes< "I don't believe you."
"okay, fine believe. I have house, child, a man and car. i got everything, my heart says other wise and sex is diminsitioning."
"Well I don't belive you."
"well, I don't believe you."
We park at the dollar store, both spring out of the truck. We are on a mission. Our conversation consist of if we are going to share the soap cost, do we need to run by the bank for change? We get back to the truck, we pick off where I left off.
"Diministing? How about mine is non-exsistant." The last time was a couple weeks ago for our anniversary, its like he doesn't want to have sex with me."
"you win, I loose this round." I frown.
We say nothing as we pull into drive thru for the coffee shop. The girl immediately recognized Jade and starts getting her coffee ready. Jade is this coffee house number one fan. Her trips make this girls paycheck happen. So, she is not only putting herself through school, she is stimulating the local economy.
As we are leaving, we catch the begining of our favorite band, WRENCH, and the way the last conversation went we were in that kind of mood. Meloncoly. She turns it up, we sing along. I park the truck, because we were not very far fromt he laundry mat and fall into the song. It's over.
"Aaaaggghhh....I love that song." My sister assesses situation in side through there big glass windows. "Let's get this shit done."

Well you know how laundry goes, unload truck, load washers, insert quarters, add detergent, and repeat. When all the clothes are doing the bubble swish dance.
"well I thought I had more clothes." I state as I stack the laundry baskets and throw them on the top of the double loader. Grab my coffee off the top and join my sister, who is already sitting in the plastic double chair bench.
She slumps and than sits up when i join her, "our anniversary was a while back."
"I don't know what to tell you, we are moving into that catagory."
"Get this, he tried to be romantic but his idea of romance is Italian food and sex. so yeah."
I just nod, I haven't seen romance in awhile.
Than she just blurt outs, "FUCK ROMANCE, Give me PASSSIIIOOOONNN. Like grrrr. Touch me mmmmmm." As she growls she shows her teeth and her fingers like claws running down a back, a man's back, sweating from their sex.
"YES!" I cross my legs and start swinging my leg. I bring the coffee cup close to my mouth to drink. My mind begins to wonder, I fix my eyes on the dryer ahead of me. She gets up and goes outta site.
I recently had an encounter of this PASSION, she craves. We had to be quite. My spine curves towards him as he touches me. His hand rubs me from my shoulder blade, down my side, a stop and grab at my ass and to my thigh. Where he grabs, moves it and gets between my legs. This man arouses me. Our kiss is full of lust and desire. I can feel his muscles flex as he moves. We are interwined, it just feels right, SO RIGHT. My legs locked at my ankles around him. HIs neck, his colar bone, his shoulder.....oh.....Passion. Our washer buzzes and snaps me back to reality. My leg was in full swing and I realized I have a big smile on my face. I stood up and i feel a little red in the face. I start unloading and look around for my sister. She comes from behind me. "BOO" I yelp, she chuckles. "So let's get this in dryer and I need a smoke."
She's smiling. I'm stil smiling.
"really? Jade." I'm curious and nothing surprises me about this girl.
"AAAA YEAH! I'm not getting it at home, I can do it myself." We are both still smiling.
"Well, I wernt off to Passion land, a little more subtle. One sentence, spoke volumes."
"mmmhhmm"
The rest of the laundry didn't seem so bad. We were both smiling the rest of the time we were together, until we got back home.